So now I have been in NY nearly 24 hours and with a lot of jet lag still to shift and the feeling like time is dragging because it should be so much later than it is, I am resting on the roof top of my hotel to voice my observations on a long haul flight.
The people: who you sit next to is as fortunate as the genetic lottery. You have no clue what cards you will be dealt with, unless of course you choose a pod or an upgrade – in which case, I envy you. It is always my nightmare that I will be stuck next to a very overweight person, meaning I have little room to move. A screaming baby is also quite unfortunate, as is someone that eats cheese flavoured crisps for the entire journey. Lets not go into all the other worse case scenarios as I am sure you have a little imagination if I say the word no deodorant. Nightmare.
The choice of TV programme you watch: This is one I discovered yesterday. I was sitting with an old couple – who were nice and harmless I must point out. Anyway, I had never watched Girls before and decided it would be a great time to see what everyone was raving about 10 years ago. Of course this was a bad choice for obvious reasons and I didn’t know whether to turn over or keep watching like a cool cucumber. Ahh. Sex scenes with old people on the plane is as bad as with parents.
The vegetarian food option: I must admit, the vegetarian food choice has become a lot nicer than the last time I went on a plane that had the luxury of giving you a cooked meal. It was super healthy with fruit for desert. I got it served a good half an hour before the other non veggies on my row, meaning there was that how do I eat it without making a mess scenario going through my head/ don’t knock them when your moving your arms enthusiastically to dig into the lettuce leaves. However, when the standard non veggie meal was delivered, I realised just how much better off it is to eat meat. They got CAKE and CRACKERS. My fruit, which was just apple and orange might I add – so boring, was so disappointing in comparison. Unless you are a vegetarian for moral reasons, I say don’t bother ticking that box. Ill be a full throttle carnivore when I return.
The toilet: There are only so many times you can go excuse me, sorry when your in a row of strangers. My weak bladder on a long old flight didn’t help the situation and you would have mistaken the name of the girl next to me for Sorry the amount of times I said it as a hint I would be interrupting her film, again.
Who else has had these problems on a flight? Jeez, I wish I was a Kardashian with my own private jet.